Movie Review: The Expendables 3
What We Liked
What We Didn't Like
The Expendables 3 is the latest installment of the cheese-tastic, 1980s style, throwback action franchise. You may not think of this series of films as anything more than an exercise in geriatric yoga for the addled action stars of yore. But, the fact is The Expendables (2010) made $275M on an $80M budget and The Expendables 2 (2012) made $305M on a $100M budget. And that is serious worldwide box-office business.
The Expendables 3 involves some unfinished business. As it turns out, Barney Ross (Sylvester Stallone), had a partner who co-founded the group with him (a new background detail sheds some light on the team’s bloody history), Conrad Stonebanks (Mel Gibson), who is out to wipe out the entire team – especially Barney. The film is directed by Patrick Hughes, a young filmmaker with only two prior films to his credit. (No you never heard of either of them.) The writing team is led by Sylvester Stallone, with help from Creighton Rothenberger and Katrin Benedikt, who broke into the business with the recent hit Olympus Has Fallen (2013).
The entire well-preserved gang is back in town. Lee Christmas (Jason Statham), Gunnar (Dolph Lundgren), Toll Road (Randy Couture), and Caesar (Terry Crews) join Barney as the film opens with a Great Train Robbery/Prison Break sequence to free Doc (Wesley Snipes). It turns out Doc was one of the original Expendables. The opening sequence demonstrates perfectly why these films are worthwhile. A delicious blend of action and humor is infused with some old-fashioned gratuitous violence. Once the antagonists become aware of each other during the course of the story, it becomes quickly apparent that Barney is going to need additional help. Enter Bonaparte (Kelsey Grammer), who helps Barney find some young guns that actually know what WiFi is. These newbies include Smilee (Kellan Lutz), Luna (Rhonda Rousey), Mars (Victor Ortiz), and Thorn (Glen Powell). The youngsters seem eager and capable, but going up against an army of baddies means even more help will be needed.
Eventually we are introduced to the team’s CIA contact, Drummer (Harrison Ford), who actually does something other than growl at Barney. He growls and flies air support. Additionally, we meet up with Yin Yang (Jet Li) who is now working for Trench (Arnold Schwarzenegger). Sadly, out last addition is Galgo (Antonio Banderas), a gun-man of all trades. Unfortunately, this character is the most tedious I have ever seen Banderas play. He is little more than a needy motor-mouth looking for a new home/gang.
Once the gang is complete, which takes entirely too long, the bullets start to fly. The build-up is over and the spectacle of the smack-down commences. I have to admit that when I went into this film I was dreading a watered down PG-13 version of the basic formula of extreme R-rated violence that we have seen and adored in the prior installments of the series. Never fear, you will still get a bang for your buck with this film.
Harrison Ford and Arnold Schwarzenegger in “The Expendables 3.” Photo by Phil Bray – © 2014 – Lionsgate.
The action is the true draw to The Expendables 3. The murky philosophical war that fuels the conflict between Barney and Stonebanks is best debated in dorm rooms. They are both fairly violent guys however you slice it, and they don’t seem likely to change their ways all that much. Guess how they will decide their mercenary ethics debate? You guessed it – a one-on-one grudge match. The uneven pace is the biggest problem in The Expendables 3. The talky, build the team sub plot was just too long. The upside of all that time was that Stallone and Grammer seemed to have fun playing old-timer mercenaries and chewing the fat and played off one another quite well. But the downside was a large chunk of slow-paced screen-time. I cannot believe that Stallone, of all people, has not seen Lee Marvin do the same exact thing in The Dirty Dozen (1967) in far less time. If you’re going to make a template movie, then follow the template. The film only works when it is in action-mode. However, when it is action-mode it is feature extremely well-choreographed mayhem.
Ultimately the final question is simple. Does The Expendables 3 prove to be the best (a relative concept here) of the series? Not sure this one will manage to surpass the others in box office or not, though I doubt it. I would put the last film, The Expendables 2, at the top of the list. Why? Best villain and climax. As lame of an actor as Jean-Claude Van Damme is, you have to admit he is a much more dynamic fighter than Gibson ever was or will be. So the boxer vs. kick boxer (Stallone vs. JCVD) ultimately makes that the better match-up. However, if you enjoyed the prior installments in the franchise you will enjoy this one.
Steven Gahm
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