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Posted August 21, 2012 by Dane Jackson in Features
 
 

Ten Actors Who Should Be In The Expendables 3

As a product of the 1980s and 1990s, I grew up on a steady diet of cheesy action movies. Plot didn’t matter. I just wanted big explosions and awesome fight scenes (thankfully, my cinematic palate has matured since those days of adolescence), so I became very familiar with the action heroes of yesteryear. That’s why a movie like The Expendables intrigued me so much when I first heard about it. Let’s get all those aging action heroes together and give them one last dance. It was high on the nostalgia factor for me, and while it admittedly isn’t the best movie around, it was a fun, popcorn-munching romp of a flick. After watching The Expendables, the natural thing to do is come up with another dream cast, right? Everyone who saw it probably wished a few other folks were involved. That’s where The Expendables 2 comes in. Unfortunately, they’re still missing some folks that I think are blatant omissions to any kind of all-star action hero cast movie. So, below find ten considerations (and two honorable mentions) for the next group of Expendables. (Note: Because all of these actors exude awesomeness in their own way, this list is in no particular order.)

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Steven Seagal

That he hasn’t been included in this franchise yet is a crime. Sure, he’s put on some weight and tried his hand at law enforcement, but deep down, I know Seagal can still kick some butt. Everything he did from Above the Law through Under Siege is gold and is a healthy enough resume to get him a part on the team. Rumor has it, Van Damme wouldn’t do The Expendables 2 if Seagal was involved, so now I want to see those two go head to head even more. Come on Sly, make it happen!

Kurt Russell

While he’s a much more versatile actor than most of the folks involved with The Expendables franchise, Kurt Russell is still well-known for his more action-oriented John Carpenter movies. Big Trouble in Little China will forever be on my Top 10 Movies list and Jack Burton is one of the best characters to come along in a very long time. Plus, the most important reason Russell needs to be included is because Tango needs to be reunited with Cash!

Carl Weathers

Apollo Creed. Major Dillon. “Action” Jackson. Those three roles alone more than solidify Weathers as a major player in the action genre. I even used to be called “Action” Jackson by a few friends back in the day. That would have never happened if not for Carl Weathers. In general, I think it’s a shame that Weathers never reached the pinnacle that his Rocky and Predator co-stars did, so now it’s time for Stallone to throw his sparring buddy a bone.

Chow Yun-Fat

When I saw my first John Woo movie, I was blown away. The action was an intense hybrid of martial arts and visceral shoot outs where no one ever reloads. For so many years, Chow Yun-Fat was the face of Hong Kong Action with movies like The Killer, A Better Tomorrow, and Hard-Boiled. I want to remember Chow Yun-Fat as a tough as nails gritty action star instead of what he’s devolved to lately (Dragonball Evolution). Why he was never really able to make a successful leap from Hong Kong action hero to American action hero is baffling, even though some of his American action flicks were actually pretty good.

Nicolas Cage

Wouldn’t Nick Cage be a great bad guy for this franchise? His career has lent itself to overacting and going off the handle and I would just love to see that kind of intensity on the big screen. Ever since I saw him as Sailor in Wild at Heart, I knew I’d like him, and he proved his action hero chops in the late 1990s with a string of action films starting with The Rock. I picture someone closer to his Castor Troy character in Face/Off for this franchise though.

Michael Biehn

If there’s anyone on this list who needs a career resuscitation, it’s Michael Biehn. His career path makes him the perfect fit as an Expendable. When he first appeared as Kyle Reese to help save Sarah Connor in The Terminator, I knew we were in for big things. And sure enough, I was right. Who doesn’t remember Hicks from Aliens? After his role as Johnny Ringo in Tombstone, he kind of fell off the map a bit (ooh…if we have Russell and Biehn in The Expendables 3, do we need Kilmer too?), and these days he’s stuck in the direct to video market. Biehn hasn’t had a fair shake with his career, so I want him in this franchise.

Brigitte Nielsen

One thing missing from the team? Estrogen. Even in an adrenaline-fueled genre, there are plenty of bad ass leading ladies to choose from. While some may think Linda Hamilton is a better choice here, I see her Sarah Connor and raise her Red Sonja (and Ludmilla from Rocky IV). I’m not sure if it would be awkward to have her on set based on her past relationship with Sylvester Stallone, but if not, I think she’s a no-brainer.

Christophe Lambert

Christophe(r) Lambert is kind of the wild card of my picks. At first glance, he may appear to be the odd man out here, especially considering most of the action flicks he’s been in were more sci-fi action flicks as opposed to the shoot-em-up brawlers everyone else on the list is familiar with. But, I think the Highlander can offer up some international mystique and intrigue to the cast. Plus, he played Raiden in the Mortal Kombat movie, so he fills the camp requirement at least.

Peter Weller

Peter Weller was the star of a movie that caused me many a nightmares as a kid, Robocop. Not because the movie was scary, but because of some of its imagery, especially the ED-209 lighting into people with its twin Gatling guns and the toxic waste body melting scene towards the end. Childhood trauma aside, as Robocop, Weller was one of the first bonafide superheroes I cared about. The fact that it was set in Detroit just made it all the better. Sure, the character got soft by the time the cartoon and Robocop 3 came along, but Weller was still a major force in 1980s action because of his portrayal of Officer Alex Murphy. High marks are also deserved for his role as Buckaroo Banzai.

Jesse Ventura

Since Steve Austin won’t be reprising his role in the sequel, there’s a blatant hole in the cast for an ex-wrestler. Roddy Piper was really only in They Live (and we all know he was just pretending to be Kurt Russell in that one), Hulk Hogan is too brittle these days, and The Rock is too mainstream. Who does that leave? Jesse “The Body” Ventura. He had parts in a few of Schwarzenegger’s movies in the 1980s, most notably Predator and The Running Man. He was also in Demotion Man with Stallone.

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Honorable Mentions

Wesley Snipes

If it weren’t for his current stint in prison, Snipes would be #1 on my list of must-haves. While Stallone and Schwarzenegger are obviously the two heavy hitters of the action genre, I think that before his downfall, Snipes was right up there with the best of them. Whether he was Nino Brown in the crime drama New Jack City, Simon Phoenix in Demolition Man, or the vigilante daywalker Blade, Snipes has always been a bad ass. Supposedly he was going to originally be Hale Caesar, but had to turn it down because of his legal troubles, which is a shame because while I like Terry Crews, he’s the one member of the Expendables cast that feels the most out of place.

Lou Diamond Phillips

Lou is my other wildcard pick aside from Christopher Lambert and I’m basing his inclusion solely on his performances in the Young Gun films. Sure, he had a few forgettable action movies in the mid-nineties, but I’ll never forget his portrayal of Chavez y Chavez. Chavez had a tremendous respect for tradition and culture, and would do anything to defend it. He was calm, cool, but when provoked, or when in front of those who massacred his people, a switch flipped and he became a thunderbolt of rage. I think Phillips can play the yin and yang of an action hero well and actually make the audience care more about the hero than the action.

Dane Jackson
Dane Jackson has been writing about movies since high school when he had a monthly column in the school paper about cult movies. His cinematic tastes have matured (slightly) since then.